This month’s theme is all about how to better understand other people, one of the foundational elements of having difficult conversations and influencing others.
You’ll notice right away this isn’t your normal “just have empathy for others” mantra. With this collection of resources, I hope to challenge and expand the way you think about understanding other peoples’ points of view.
Ready? Let’s get started
–Resource 1–
Behavioral Scientist Article: Perspective Taking vs. Perspective Getting
This is a distinction that I’ve been writing and talking about for awhile. Conventional wisdom says that it’s important to take the perspective of someone else to better understand their worldview. I think that’s true, but our own ability to figure this out is limited. I’ve become a big advocate of actively getting someone else’s worldview and that conversation in and of itself is a huge relationship builder.
–Resource 2–
The Conflict Expert Article: Questions to help you see the other person’s point of view
This is one of the more comprehensive lists that I’ve come across in my journey. Even as I share my own toolkit later, this is a really good list of questions you can ask yourself or someone else to better understand someone else.
–Resource 3–
Book: Influence
This book by Robert Cialdini has long been a staple in the discussion around the science of persuasion. The key to that has always been understanding them and psychology. I encourage you to check out this book.
–Resource 4–
HBR Article: How to understand someone else’s POV
This article by HBR is a really simple, yet cool framework to even understand how to understand someone else’s POV. I like their framing of it as situational, personal, and solution awareness – so simple, yet it covers everything.
–Resource 5–
Worksheet: Understanding Others Worksheet
As part of my difficult conversations course, I actually have a free download that’s a toolkit to help you think through another person’s needs and personality. I encourage you to use a mix of personal observation, active conversation with the other person, and conversation with others that know that person the best.
Or you can just visit it my website to grab it
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I hope these resources are helpful, see you next month!
Cheers,
Chris
PS – If you’re struggling with being assertive in difficult conversations in your personal or professional life, I’ve got a way to help you!
In my Master Difficult Conversations course, I help you handle the toughest conversations with confidence, balance empathy and assertiveness, and respond to the most difficult behaviors.
In this blend of both self-paced and 1:1 sessions with myself, you get the opportunity to turn theory into practice and build the relationships you want.
